Chris's House Party, what a start to the new year...

Its 1st Jan 2006! was at chris's house wiha bunch of friends for dinner, watched kylie's showgirl DVD, played games, watched Spongebob Square Pants and David did a tarot card reading for me...

received a piece of news that was long due today before leaving for chris's place...after so much i've put myself gone through, it is upon today, i've been told/ realised that what happened in the past is all not worth it... all wasted.. someone has not been honest with me all these while.. i was overwhelmed AGAIN, and started tearing... but after 10mins, i picked myself up and left my place... everything that happened now, seems like a blur.. what happened actually?? was it that person's fault? was it my own wishful thinking? i know its definitely not the other party's fault... but he has been not honest... really not honest.. i felt more anguish and frustration towards myself more than anything esle... i mean, what did i made myself go through? it was a long delayed matter and i chose to ignore till today.. the first day of 2006... silly me...

david did a tarot card reading for me... which both him and i felt that it was pretty true... and it also tells me that, i should start looking within me for answers and start believing myself.. to feel content, to create a balance between my outer preceived self and my inner self (my roots basically) it was a very interesting reading and i have to say, it rather suits the siuation that has recently arised...

the guys have been great today... chris kept telling me, its going to turn out fine... david gave some words of encouragement and analysing the cards for me and working through the reading with me... and roy, emotional support... really happy that i did not spend today alone at home cos i don't think i would have been able to handle it as well as i think i am trying my best to right at this moment... i still am trying to think things through.... thanks guys... thanks a lot from the bottom of my heart... really... the tight hugs were very comforting... =) thank you... you guys are the greatest....